Honestly, I have typed out this blog probably a dozen times and deleted it, started over, delete again and so on... I feel there's not much really for me to contribute besides our story and how we got here.
Hopefully, somebody can walk away feeling encouraged or not alone as we all dive in!!
Almost 12 years ago, husband and I had the conversation about kids and schooling. I claim the word"homeschool" never came up and he says it did:)) The one thing we have always agreed on though was that we wanted our kids to receive a solid Christ-based education. The picture in my head was me dropping our 3 kids off at this really quaint little Christian school and me just doing mom stuff until it was time to go pick them up and listen to the day's events!!!. :) Now, as the season approaches I realize "me dropping our 3 kids off at this really quaint little Christian school" just isn't reality right now in more ways than one:))) I have never thought of me capable of homeschooling our child, but God has placed me in a family that is experienced, have alot of resources, and full of love, patience and grace. I know I don't have to do it by myself which has always been a fear with schooling my child.
The word "homeschool" has always intimidated me,, the thought that my child's education lies in my hands seriously makes me stop breathing for a minute. Here are a few examples why....
1. I really believed Chicago was a state up until about 10 years ago:)
2. I recently misled my daughter in what a baby horse was called.
3. This past Sunday, I was sounding out the letter "F" for my daughter and husband had to correct me:)
4. and just now while typing this blog, Ryan was reading it and telling me where to put my commas and correcting my grammar!!!!!!!!!
So, I am always constantly dramatically saying "see that's why I should'nt be homeschooling!!!!!!":))
I'm not really that patient and have never had the desire to teach, especially children. Just being for real--I have no problem doing anything non strutured, like playin in the hose or painting or play doh,,, but to teach.. huh!!!!! I'd rather do something else:) I have'nt even started homeschool yet and while I'm very very excited about my little girl starting school, feeling selfish is already a HUGE challenge and I'm feeling inadequate and overwhelmed thinking are'nt there any other options????????????, I have always been reluctant to cast myself in the role of a "homeschool mom."
So, I'm pretty thankful for my sister in law Danette opening up her schoolroom for Micah. We don't have all the details ironed out just yet, but I do know that Micah and I will go to Danette's for school where we will join her cousins, Lydia, Abigail, Calvin, and Lincoln. Lincoln and Micah will be doing preschool together as well as another little friend, Kaia. Micah is ecstatic, she adores her aunt Nette Nette. Some days, my other sister in law Misty http://findingmyway9598.blogspot.com/ and rest of the cousins will probably join us. Between myself and my sister in laws, we all have strengths where the other may lack skill or interest, so I have a feeling the kids probably will not be the only ones to learn something this next school year! :)
I know the days ahead will bring challenges, Micah's sunday school teacher just reminded me of that yesterday at church. :) sigh:))))) I wanted to be a Mom years before God finally brought Micah to us so I've had alot of time to imagine and daydream about the firsts of the school years. Here is just a few.. these are sooo not in order:))))
1. 1st day of school eve:)-I think I'll be more excited than Micah.... and again, I know we are just traveling to Aunt nette nette's house, but that's like Disneyland to Micah.:)
2. Hearing Micah repeat the Pledge to the American Flag, Christian Flag and the Bible after me. I have no idea how I'll get through that without sobbing.
3. Singing all the silly songs with Micah to help us learn our letter sounds.
4. Watching her sit still with her cousins as she just soaks it all up.......... I know.. the sitting still part needs to be worked on...
5. the excitement of learning something new and completing it and being proud of herself and hearing over and over "Mommy I did it!!!!!!!!!!"
Parenting is undoubtedly one of the biggest challenges for most of us, I think :) at least for me it is. I constantly worry, am I doing it right, is she going to remember everything she has been taught and apply it,, is she going to always pursue God, is homeschooling the right thing for her,, is she missing out and it going to affect her in a negative way, is what I'm doing going to JACK her up?????????????
Seriously, I constantly have to give her up to God. I have been reading a book called Revolutionary Parenting and I looooooove it. This next paragraph is from that book, and while the book has nothing to do with homeschool-I find it reassuring that God has it all in His hands.
God tells us that if we have surrendred our lives to Him and are listening for His guidance, then we may give Him and our children the best effort we can muster and confidently leave the results to Him. The Scriptures remind us that while we have free will, we do not possess control over reality.
Nothing drives that point home harder than our experience raising children. Our job is not to succeed but to be obedient to God's calling and principles and allow Him to produce the outcomes according to His perfect will. With that in mind, perhaps we can take a deep breath and relax. As much as you love your children, God loves them more. As deeply as you desire to do what is best for your children, God wants it even more urgently. As we rely upon Him rather than our own ideas and wisdom, we can be assured that our young ones will experience the best that God has to offer, through us and others.
xox
Jada
